Influence: Master Life’s Most Powerful Skill
Professor Ken Brown restored my faith in humanity. He created 12 lectures for a Great Courses program with the same title as this article, and I called him up to ask whether influence and persuasion were really just ways to manipulate others.
Thankfully, he had a great answer for me. Ken started with a quick overview.
"If you are a good person with good intentions and you explain what you are trying to get accomplished in a way that appeals to the interests of the people you are trying to persuade, you are 90% of the way there."
In other words, influence isn't about employing tricks and techniques to get people to do what you want. It involves caring about them and being highly competent in doing what you promised.
Ken continued, "This is a detail that tends to get lost among all the talk about the nature of your handshake, the importance of eye contact and the like: If you are genuine, you are going to do most of the things right."
If you actually listen to others and remember what they say, you will be able to have an influence on their thoughts and actions. This is not because you are a manipulator, but because you are demonstrating genuine interest, concern, and understanding.
Ken explains the need for his course by saying that there are numerous ways you can present yourself and an argument. He assumes you want to get a fair deal for yourself and to make a positive impact on the world. If you present yourself in a manner that resonates with your audience, you are likely to get a better outcome.
Comments
Post a Comment